I remember the first time I shot-up like it was yesterday. My nose was sore from snorting and I was not ready for the party to end. I had a friend that I knew who was already shooting up, so I called him and asked him to teach me how to do it correctly. At the time, he was my only other friend that was using I.V. drugs and he was more than happy to have a “partner in crime.” We would sneak off together and do a shot of meth, while hiding in a closet or bathroom just far enough from the prying eyes of our friends that would have shunned us for such a street-level choice.

I soon learned that my skills as a veterinary technician were going to be most beneficial to both of us. We lived in a shirtless, hardly- clothed environment in Florida and had several friends that would catch on quickly if there were not a certain level of skill involved in our hitting of the veins. My friend was impressed with my skills as a meth nurse and I explained how hard it was to hit the back leg vein of a cat. My vet skills transferred nicely to my becoming a master at finding an accurate hit on our comparatively enormous human veins.

I do remember one time going too low on my own arm and blowing a vein. The result of my missed hit was the most interesting bruise I have ever seen on an arm. Luckily, I was gay and the bruise was explained away as a mishap with a candleholder. I know, lame excuse right? I told my friends that I fell and one of the hurricane candleholders in my house stabbed me. They bought it hook, line and sinker…I think? At the time, it was good for some sympathy. Now it is only good for a laugh, a bit of self-reflection and an “Oh my!” - I was such a “crack head.”

To me shooting up was such a cleaner and longer-lasting high. I remember in certain social settings I would be offered a “bump” (drug term meaning a dose) and I would cringe at the awful burning sensation that was about to consume my nose. I never found a classy way to ask the person if I could take the bump in the bathroom and shoot it up. So, I would snort the bump off the end of a pen cap or, if I was partying with the “high- class set” the bump would be delivered off the end of a specially made bottle with an attached spoon.

I became such a snob about snorting meth. I had convinced myself that shooting-up was the only, and best, way to do meth. People who snorted it were in some way wasting a good hit. It was helpful to my psyche to feel superior in my delivery choice and, let’s be honest, that is the only difference. We were all drug addicts. Shooting up drugs has been labeled the lowest of the low in the drug world. Now for the truth, whether a smoker, shooter, or a snorter, a drug user is a drug user regardless of the delivery method. The delivery method is just a personal choice of how you choose to poison your body.